Life After Trauma: Reclaiming Joy in Small Doses
Life after trauma can feel unfamiliar, heavy, and at times—completely upside down. The world that used to feel safe suddenly seems different. Even simple joys can seem lost or out of reach. Most people think healing means “getting over it,” but healing after trauma is more like growing with a scar—life goes on, but the world looks different.
Joy may not return all at once. It usually doesn’t. Sometimes, joy shows up in small, almost hidden ways. The Buddhist parable of “The Tigers & The Strawberry” paints a picture that sticks with you. Imagine being chased by tigers, hanging from a vine over a cliff—danger everywhere. Yet, right there, you spot a single strawberry. And you taste it. That strawberry, in the midst of fear, is pure sweetness. That’s the heart of reclaiming joy after trauma—learning to savor small, meaningful moments, even when everything else still hurts.
Understanding Trauma's Impact on Daily Life
Trauma changes how we meet the world. It shapes how we trust, how we feel, and how we show up in daily life. Relationships might start to feel fragile. Little things can set off big feelings. At times, getting through the day feels like wading through mud.
Trauma can leave you feeling like you’ve lost something important—a sense of safety, maybe even your old self. Many people feel numb or overwhelmed. Everyday tasks like making coffee or answering a text can seem pointless or way too much. Trauma has a way of shrinking the world and making life feel smaller and heavier.
Disconnection and Emotional Numbness
Numbness is a common companion after trauma. Some people describe it as feeling “frozen” or “not fully here.” You might not feel happy, but you don’t feel sad either. Sometimes it’s hard to tell what you feel at all. The laugh that once bubbled up at a silly meme, or the lump in your throat during a sad movie—they may just be gone.
Disconnection isn’t just emotional, either. It sometimes shows up in the body—food doesn’t taste like much, music doesn’t hit the same, and hugs feel distant. That’s both confusing and frustrating. But you’re not alone, and you’re not broken.
Triggers and Overwhelm in Everyday Situations
Suddenly, the normal world doesn’t feel so normal. A song, a smell, or even the way sunlight falls through the kitchen window can set off panic or throw you into a spiral. Things that once brought comfort or routine—a favorite café, a crowded grocery store—can now cause anxiety.
This isn’t weakness. It’s your brain and body reacting to keep you safe. The problem is, your alarm system is now set too high. Joy, peace, and comfort might feel far away.
Loss of Meaning or Motivation
For many, trauma stirs up big, hard questions. You might ask, “What’s the point?” or “Will I ever feel normal again?” Energy disappears. Things you once cared about can feel empty. Even knowing what you want can feel impossible.
Loss of motivation isn’t laziness. It’s a normal response to pain, confusion, or fear. But it doesn’t have to last forever—even if it hangs around for a while.
Reclaiming Joy in Small Doses
Now, about those strawberries. Damien Robinson, one half of ATX Mental Health, often shares this story: Even with tigers overhead and danger everywhere, there’s that strawberry. For trauma survivors, the path to feeling alive again means collecting small, real moments of joy—one taste at a time.
Joy doesn’t need to be huge. It can start small and grow quietly. A breeze through your window. A hot shower. The warmth of sunlight, or the sound of laughter on a podcast. These “micro-moments” plant seeds of hope, even in difficult soil.
The Strawberries: Meaningful Micro-Moments
The secret isn’t searching for giant happiness. It’s in noticing and savoring little things—a friend’s text, the feel of soft socks, the taste of a strawberry on your tongue.
Start by slowing down and paying attention:
Notice what feels even a little bit good: The smell of fresh coffee, a funny meme, the sound of rain on the roof.
Pause to really experience that moment: Let yourself taste, hear, or feel it as fully as you can.
Name it and be present: “I love this song,” or “The sun feels warm on my skin.” Naming helps anchor your attention and builds awareness.
Like collecting smooth stones in your pocket, these moments add up.
Personalized Practices for Rediscovering Joy
Everybody’s healing is different, so finding joy again takes some experimenting. Here are some ideas that can help you reconnect on your own terms:
Mindful walks (even just around your block)
Spending time with pets
Creative hobbies: coloring, music, cooking, or writing
Reconnecting with the natural world: gardening, watching birds, touching leaves
Sensory grounding: playing with clay, listening to music, sitting where you feel safe
Light movement, like stretching, yoga, or swaying to your favorite song
Allowing yourself to play or be silly—yes, even as an adult
The point isn’t to “fix” yourself, but to honor what makes you smile, even briefly.
Self-Compassion and Patience in Healing
Please, go easy on yourself. Reclaiming joy after trauma can feel slow, even awkward. Some days you’ll notice the strawberries, other days it might feel like there’s nothing sweet at all.
Joy doesn’t need to be big or constant to count. Each small glimmer builds your sense of possibility. Healing is not a race. Treat yourself as you would a friend—with patience, kindness, and zero pressure to have it all figured out.
Seeking Support and Building Connection
While some steps happen quietly and alone, support from others makes a huge difference. Trauma isolates, but healing is often easier with backup. That backup looks different for everyone: therapy, community groups, or time with people who “get it.”
ATX Mental Health, led by Sarah and Damien Robinson, provides therapy and coaching that meets you where you are. Their focus is personal—what works for one person might not fit another. Finding the right team can help you feel less alone in your process.
Therapeutic Approaches and Tools
Healing from trauma can be complex, but you don’t have to do it by yourself. Here are some therapies and tools that can help:
EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing): This process can help you address painful memories and gradually lower their impact.
Mindfulness counseling: Focusing on the present helps you connect to small joys as they come, instead of being pulled into old pain.
Enneagram coaching: By understanding your unique patterns, you can learn better self-acceptance and find your personal path back to meaning.
Professional help brings safety, structure, and accountability to your journey—especially when life feels too hard to handle alone.
The Power of Safe Relationships
Trauma can damage trust. It can make being with others confusing or even scary. Yet, gentle connection is often the best medicine. Time spent with a caring person, even in small doses, reminds you that you belong.
You don’t need a crowd. A few kind souls—friends, a therapist, a partner—can be enough. Safe relationships help soften defenses, making way for laughter, comfort, and calm to slip back in. Step by step, these connections show your nervous system that it’s okay to relax and enjoy small things again.
Joy Is Possible—Even After Trauma
The journey toward joy isn’t a straight line. Some days, it’s about survival. Other days, it’s about finding a single, sweet moment and letting yourself taste it—like that tiny strawberry being savored in the face of tigers.
Healing and happiness happen bit by bit. You don’t need to rush or aim for grand, movie-worthy joy. Instead, collect the small, honest moments. Let yourself notice them. Celebrate them. And when you need more help, know that reaching out is a sign of strength, not weakness.
The tigers may still be there, and the cliff may feel real. But even then, the strawberries are there, too—waiting to be noticed, savored, and cherished again. Keep looking for them. Bit by bit, joy can return, and so can you.